In speaking, there's the option of using variation of tones and gestures so that you can emphasize and stress what is important. You can also use punctuation to convey your emotions. You can convey if you're excited or upset regarding the topic.
However, writing is ambiguous. There are only twenty six letters in the alphabet and the variety of punctuation is very limited. This is the reason why some writings are misunderstood and the message is not always clearly delivered.
This frequently happens to me with text messages. Texts remind me of small, quick and informal e-mails through mobile phones. You basically write as if you're talking. This is where the problem occurs.
Yesterday, my friend had misunderstood my texts and the situation became unnecessarily serious and filled with tension. This was our conversation that took place at 2:00PM.
Me: Hey, can you please take me to Target sometime this week? Pretty pleaseee.
Friend: Sure! I'm going with my friends tonight. Wanna come along?
Me: Oh my gosh, awesome. Thank you so much!
Friend: K, I'll let you know when I'm leaving.
This was our second conversation that took place at 10:00PM. I did not get a text or a call that my friend left for Target and I was wondering why there was no contact.
Me: Are we still going?
Friend: I already went.
(Before sending the text, I felt as though something was a little...fishy. The text was too short and the period added to the coldness of the tone.)
Me: Ahh, are you serious? Why do you do this to me dude??
(I tried to be sarcastically funny instead of asking why my friend left without letting me know because I was afraid a petty fight might occur.)
Friend: What? Why are you mad?
Mad? Why am I mad? I was far from mad. I was trying to throw in a sarcastic joke to break the tension and awkwardness I felt for him not asking me to go. Was I just not getting it? Is it my friend who is misunderstanding the situation?
This is the problem with text messaging and overall, writing at times. There are so many obstacles to being coherent, especially if you're not speaking but writing it. It's hard to tell what the other person feels or is trying to emotionally convey.
I guess for next time, I need to be more cautious in what and how I communicate my texts. Maybe I should avoid sarcasm because it's hard to catch on- I wouldn't want an incident like this to reoccur.
SALLY! Story of my life. I think texting forces everyone to dull down their personality so that it isn't misunderstood. Tone is completely up in the air for interpretation. Too often have I been stuck in the same situation as you. In this modern age, face to face conversation is not as common as texting. Texting is easier and more convenient- however it requires specific knowledge on how to convey your message carefully.
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